I'm lost for words... wierd huh... lol... for some strange reason i couldn't find anything to talk to u about today...
my heart skipped a beat when i saw u come online **i've been waiting to see you for days**... yet... nothing... we've got nothing interesting to talk to each other about...
when u 1st came into my life, i felt the butterflies in my tummy... i felt the warm fuzzy wuzzies... i felt the excitment everytime i hear the message beep tone on my phone... so that is how it feels like to fall in love huh??
when we had our 1st date, u were so so so sooooooooooooooooo late... yet i waited... hoping and praying that it wasn't all a dream... or even worst, a prank... some sadistic act to "torture the fat girl"... but u came through... just as i was about to walk away, u tapped me on my shoulder... lol... my heart almost stopped when i turned around.... u were CUTE and rather flustered coz u got lost... haha... i wasn't even mad that you made me wait for over an hour...
Although we didn't get to spend much time together, u were a complete sweetheart... i got to hold a guy's hand for the first time in my life :) ... haha... although the string of events leading to that moment were rather akward... but it was fun... u were fun :) ...
thanks for taking me to the movies... i never thought any guy would wanna take me out to the movies, let alone hold my hand in public.... those few days i spent with you were the happiest moments of my life...
yet... i didn't feel a spark... i didn't feel the chemistry... i thought we wern't right for each other... i thought we could only be friends... i stupidly gave up...
i've thought long and hard about this... if i really didn't feel for you, why do i get jealous when u're with other girls?? why did i feel like there was a huge rock crushing my heart when u started distancing yourself from me??
it's been years... it was nice to hear from you again... i want you back so bad... i finally understand how i feel... it wasn't you... it was me... you never despised me... i despised myself... and because of that, i didn't have the confidence to love or to be loved... now i know... but its all too late....
its ok... i'm ok... i think its time i let go now... but i'll always be here for you if you need me...
i'll never forget the day you held my hand and walked me to class...
Thanks dear, for loving me :)
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